Monday, May 09, 2005

Carme García Ribas ens presenta un nou model de dona

Carme García Ribas (Barcelona, 1954) és periodista i professora de comunicació a l’Escola Superior de Comerç Internacional, a Barcelona.“Em van demanar que fes classes d’oratòria a la UPF. Vaig intentar remenar i documentar-me per elaborar la meva pròpia metodologia, però no vaig trobar suficients recursos. Així que em vaig dedicar a observar”. Va ser a partir d’aquest moment quan Garcia Ribas va deduir que l’arrel del bon comunicador és la por. I poc a poc ho ha anat fent extensible al món de la dona i les seves autolimitacions.
S’atribueix el concepte i el terme del “síndrome de Maripili i el síndrome de Manolo”, al mateix temps que se’n riu de l’intent que han fet uns psicòlegs americans de copiar la seva idea, citant el síndrome com un descobriment americà de fa ja sis anys. “Almenys li podrien haver canviat el nom i haver-lo batejat amb el nom d’Smith; però un Manolo als Estats Units...”.
La Carme sembla una dona divertida, afable i madura. Tal i com l’hem sentit parlar, demostra tenir un domini absolut de les seves pors i la seva imatge de cara el públic a través de les eines que ella considera fonamentals: la “respiració i el somriure, que és molt barat i tothom l’agraeix”. És una persona de presència relaxada i tranquila, però amb molt a explicar. Com a bona periodista de ràdio es caracteritza per la seva vocalització de cada una de les paraules que pronuncia. Mentre parla, es mostra segura i fins i tot arriba a crear un clima de complicitat i interactivitat amb una rapidesa admirable. Es nota que és una professional del tema. Es denota confiança en el seu tracte. Suposo que ajuda la nostra condició femenina i de futures periodistes, trets que ens caracteritzen a les tres entrevistadores. Com també influeixen les ganes amb què explica la seva nova aportació i les ànsies perquè l’entenguem millor.
Aquesta periodista, llicenciada en Ciències de la Informació en la segona promoció de la Universitat Autònoma de Barcelona, va començar la seva carrera professional a Interviu. Des d’aquella primera entrevista publicada a Felipe González, ha passat de les col·laboracions a programes com Protagonistas de Luis del Olmo, o les Mil i Una, a la docència i al món de la comunicació empresarial. De fet, en el seu currículum també hi trobem el càrrec de consultora de comunicació estratègica. Es pot dir que ha substituit les càmares i els micròfons pels més grans empresaris i directius d’empreses com Indo o Uriach, a qui també fa classes de lideratge. Fins i tot ha publicat un llibre (2003), “Tinc por; carisma i lideratge a través de la gestió de la por”, des d’on reivindica la necessitat de saber gestionar les nostres pors, per evitar que els altres “facin negoci amb elles”.
Actualment, però, dirigeix la mirada cap a la vessant més femenina, i analitza aquestes pors en el món de la dona, l’anomenat síndrome de Maripili, que pretén combatre a partir de l’autenticitat de la persona, amagada per culpa dels flamants i limitatius estereotips.



Sortim de la conferència que Carmen García Ribas ha pronunciat a l’Aula Magna de L’Universitat Autònoma de Barcelona, on ens ha fet reflexionar a tots els futurs comunicadors sobre la por. El seu caràcter natural i espontani fa que no es distingeixi entre els alumnes i professors que es passegen pels passadissos, carregats de carpetes d’apunts i maletins. Trobem una classe buida, i ens hi instal·lem. Ens insisteix perquè ens asseguem totes juntes, i adopta una postura còmoda, amb una mirada que reflecteix una actitud receptiva. No sabem si aquesta naturalitat es deu al seu caràcter o al fet què ens trobem en un espai que per ella deu ser habitual: una classe.

“Totes les dones som Maripilis perquè a causa del nostre model cultural tenim por a no ser estimades”. Segons aquesta periodista barcelonina, les dones adoptem actituds i comportaments de submissió i d’autolimitació a causa d’aquesta por a no ser acceptades. “Quan dic la majoria, dic la de totes les edats. Perquè les noies de 18 anys que tinc a la universitat es comporten exactament igual”, assegura des de la seva faceta de professora. I és que tot i l’espectacular augment d’alumnes universitàries, les noies no arribem a superar tampoc l’estereotip. La formació femenina creix, però es segueix adoptant un rol segons els dictàmens de la societat. Segons Garcia Ribas, “diversos estudis publicats als Estats Units demostren que les dones cada vegada tindran més dificultat per trobar parella, perquè elles seran molt superiors”. La periodista afirma que aquest és un procés formatiu “imparable”, que s’ha d’utilitzar “en benefici nostre”. Tot i així, insisteix en què és fàcil trobar una dona al costat d’un home quan aquest triomfa. No és el cas d’una dona d’èxit. Primer que tot, és més difícil trobar una dona d’èxit, ja que el seu paper estereotipat la porta a ser ella el punt de “recolzament de l’home”. “A les dones d’èxit, difícilment les acompanyen els homes”, insisteix Garcia Ribas. A més, aquestes tendeixen a prendre el model directiu masculí, forçant encara més una identitat no pròpia de la condició femenina. La periodista assegura que un dels objectius ha de ser treballar models de lideratge basats en la cultura de les dones.
D’altra banda, la dona d’èxit és acusada per la societat d’abandonar la seva família, quan en realitat “el que passa és que moltes vegades l’abandonen a ella”, remarca. I és que la Carme assegura que els homes busquen com a complement una dona “que sigui inferior” per així sentir-se més reforçats. Aquest és l’origen de tots aquests rituals “d’invalidesa permanent” que fem les dones com a “procés adaptatiu” en la parella. Segons Garcí Ribas, “amb comportaments com el coquetejar, l’únic que pretenem és fer-nos estimar, i al final, com amb tot el que provoca la por, l’únic que s’aconsegueixes és tot el contrari. Que no t’estimin, i a sobre que no t’estimis ni tu. Perquè en realitat, la Maripili no s’estima a ella mateixa”.


“Tots tenim por cada dia –assegura Garcia Ribas- però la por no és dolenta, s’ha de saber gestionar”. El que passa és que socialment, “està molt mal vist tenir por”. Segons l’anàlisi de la periodista, les dones tendim a tenir por del rebuig, del “no ser estimades”.
En canvi, els homes temen el fracàs, associat a la idea masculina “de no arribar a ser algú”. Aquesta tendència també ha estat analitzada per la Carme, que l’ha anomenat el “síndrome del Manolo”. “Així com a nosaltres ens envien missatges de si no ets això no t’estimaran, als homes els arriben missatges de si no arribes aquí, fracassaràs”, afirma la periodista barcelonina. Aquesta és la causa de moltes de les actituds arrogants i agressives que adopten els homes. Això sí: segons la Carme, “no tots els homes són Manolos.En canvi, totes les dones són Maripilis”.
El síndrome de Manolo i Maripili són tractats per Carmen García Ribas en els seus cursos de comunicació i habilitats emocionals realitzats a l’ESCI (Escola Superior de Comerç Internacional). Com a professora de comunicació, treballa aspectes com les actituds inconscients de sabotatge o la persuasió en el discurs oral. En l’aspecte femení, però, García Ribas es desmarca del que podria semblar un moviment feminista. Segons la periodista, “l’alternativa a ser Maripili és ser estratègica”, la qual cosa es tradueix en adonar-se de quina és la situació en cada moment de la teva vida: què no tens, què pots fer, ... I a partir d’aquí, actuar conseqüentment”, conclueix García Ribas.

Quan li demanem la seva opinió sobre la mesura socialista de la paritat entre homes i dones, s’exalta. “Amb aquesta excusa de l’igualtat ens estan enxufant un model que no és el nostre. Què vol dir que hem de ser iguals? Iguals a qui?” protesta la periodista. Segons García Ribas, el tema de la igualtat va sorgir en l’inici del feminisme, “perquè el què es demanava era l’igualtat legal". “I és que fa relativament poc, les dones no eren iguals davant la llei” es queixa. Tot i així, i adaptant-nos a la nostra situació actual, la periodista afirma que “els homes i les dones som molt diferents culturalment”. És per això que ella defensa “l’identitat”. “Cadascú la seva”, reivindica García Ribas..

La Carme ens comenta que les seves alumnes no volen que s’utilitzi més la terminologia de la Maripili, perquè amb aquest tractament, “es frivolitza” el veritable objectiu del procés de conscienciació. Segons la periodista, els mitjans de comunicació són els primers difusors d’estereotips de la societat, que provoquen l’autocensura de la dona i que la forcen a desitjar un tòpic que “és mentida, no és real”. “Hi ha un eix transversal que diu que la teva vida té sentit si et cases i tens fills. I, a més a més, o mentrestant, pots anar essent professional -comenta García Ribas-, i aquest precisament és un estereotip limitatiu que serveix per sabotejar tot el teu projecte”.

Carmen García Ribas assegura que si les dones “ens en volem sortir, haurem de gestionar les nostres pors i les d’ells”. “L’únic que porta això és a ser autèntica. Es tracta de ser tu mateixa, i al que et porta és a respectar-te”, afirma aquesta barcelonina. “ I donar-se permís per ser, és la clau”.

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